B9

The biopsy was benign. Thank God. Still need to have my thyroid out because it's so big but first I have to find a new surgeon. Will not be dealing with this one any more.

Au Revoir, NaBloPoMo

Today is the last day of NaBloPoMo. Thank God!

I actually made it. The posts were pretty lousy and that is a reflection of how the month went. I had so much on my mind that quality posts just didn't happen. There were many days that I just couldn't think of anything to say without breaking certain promises I made to myself when I started this thing. Of course, since today is the last day, I have like five things on my mind that I could post about. Ain't that the way?

Thanks to the Randomizer my stats went up and I have a couple of people who actually come here! I have also found some really great new reads to add to my Bloglines.

Thanks to the brave (and quite possibly very bored) readers. Hopefully I can get my head out of my rear and not put you to sleep when you come here. Unless sleep is what you want and then I am happy to help.

Would I do NaBloPoMo again? I don't know. If I do I would need to have a plan in advance of what I would say. I would also need a life that wasn't in a total uproar!

I have gotten in the habit of coming here everyday and it will be weird to not have to post. I wonder, now that the pressure is off, will I still post every day? I may take a few days off from the ice cream shop or I may post three more times today, who knows?

Anyway, thanks for the memories, NaBloPoMo.

Where My Head Does a Complete 360 a la Linda Blair

I hate when people lie to me! That, that person (a term I use generously because most people don't lie blatantly) at the doctor's office- ya know, the one who told me the dr. would call first thing- well she is a damn liar. I just called there and lo and freakin behold, "Mrs.___, the doctor did not have office hours today, he is in surgery all day on Wednesdays." What the hell? I f he is in surgery on Wednesdays why did you not just tell me that yesterday? Why? (insert appropriate nasty words here)

I can call tomorrow after 2:30.

If I don't start spewing pea soup before that.

Growing Old WAITING!

It is after 1PM here and I still haven't heard anything. So much for first thing. I know the receptionist has no control over the doctor and let me tell ya, once I get these results, I sure as hell am not going back to this doctor. I don't care if he's the last doctor on the damn earth, I'm going someplace else. I've called my voice mail about 12 million times to see if there was any message. Now I'm hanging out here. I'm going to call them again, my blood pressure could use a workout.

STILL Waiting!

Being persistent (impatient), I called the doctor's office at 4:45 this afternoon.

"Hi this is Bethany ____, has the doctor looked at my results yet?"

"Mrs. ____, I told you, the doctor is very busy and would probably not get to them today. He has already left the office for the day", said the receptionist with her bitchy, bad mood voice.

Sweet as could be, without a hint of sarcasm, I say, "It sounds like you're having one of those days."

Big exhale, a little calmer, "I sure am, it started bad and just kept going."

"Yeah, I know what you mean. I've been waiting all day to hear if I have cancer. Now I get to wait all night."

"Oh, I'll have Doctor call you first thing in the morning."

Yeah and I'll hold my breath waiting.

Still Waiting

Because I hate to wait, I called the doctor's office to see if the results were in. The receptionist said they are in but he hasn't reviewed them yet. Of course she can't say anything. I understand that but it sucks that she knows & I don't. Anyway, the doctor has meetings this morning and a full load of patients this afternoon. She thinks "It is highly unlikely that you will hear from him today." Well let me tell you, it was all I could do to not unload on this woman! I understand she is doing her job, she's not a doctor, blah blah blah. But she did not have to come off like such a bitch. This was my first phone call, not the tenth. I couldn't possibly have annoyed her in one three minute phone call. When did courtesy and compassion become bad things to show other people? I mean, Damn!

I Hate Waiting

I am supposed to find out the results of the biopsy today. I usually don't work on Tuesdays but I am today, just for a few hours while the Squish is at preschool. We could use the money and the end of the month is very busy at my job. Next month will be even more fun because I get to close out the whole year! Hoo-ray. No matter how perfectly every month closes and balances for some reason there is always some major problem closing out the year. Things to look forward too.
Anyway, I'll let you know what the results are when I get them.

Good Reading

I love history and I love to read. I especially like to read fiction with a historical background. I also love a fiction series with recurring characters. I like to see what happens next, ya know what I mean?

I have been reading a fiction series that has all of these qualities. Author Michael Jecks has a wonderful series featuring a former Knight Templar, Sir Baldwin Furnshill and his friend, Bailiff Simon Puttock. These novels are set in 1300's England and feature Baldwin and Simon solving a crime (usually murder- maybe always murder, I haven't read them all so I'm not sure). Mr. Jecks is a gifted writer. He really gives a sense of what life was like back then. He has a helpful glossary and cast of characters in the beginning of many of the books- great for keeping track of everyone and deciphering some medieval words! The mystery part of the books keeps you guessing. I hate a mystery that has a convenient ending- "so & so did it"- but the story just doesn't support the conclusion. These books are not like that. Mr. Jecks is very skillful with his plotting.

If you like a good mystery, you should try these books.

Big Guy's Favorite Cookie

Here is your first Ice Cream Mama cookie recipe. My husband loves these. We call them Snowballs but I have also heard them called Russian Tea Cakes. They are really easy to make and since they don't spread you can put a whole bunch of them on one cookie sheet.

1 cup butter
1/2 cup powdered sugar
1 tsp vanilla
2 1/4 cups flour
1/4 tsp salt
3/4 cup finely chopped nuts (I use walnuts)
powdered sugar for covering

Preheat oven to 400
Mix butter, powdered sugar and vanilla.
Stir in flour and salt.
Stir in nuts.
Chill dough about one hour.
Roll into 1/2 inch balls.
Bake for about 10 minutes. (That is how long in my oven- adjust for your own)
While warm, roll in powdered sugar.
Cool completely.
Roll in sugar again.

I don't know how many this makes because they go faster than I can count.

"I'm a Cowgirl, Mama!"

I took the Squishy One to a petting zoo today. It was small but they had some cute animals. She got to ride the pony twice since they were not busy. She was so thrilled. It was so much fun to watch her.

They had a small pen with a goat, a calf, a sheep, two chickens and a small donkey. She was in the pen with them petting her little hands off. All of a sudden she got this funny look on her face. I asked her what was wrong. She said, "Mama, I smell something. Something bad."
Well, kiddo, that is what animals smell like!

She had a good time and it was something different to do. Also, it was free and free is good!

Why Not Green Friday?

I mean that is the color of money, right?

I'm not a shopper on a good day never mind on a day called Black Friday. Even if I wasn't hobbling around on crutches I still wouldn't be out there at 5:00 in the morning. There is not much that would induce me to get out of my bed before 5 AM. I highly value my sleep!

Needless to say, my children will not be getting the Wii or the Sega 5 Gazillion or whatever the hell it is because I also don't camp out for anything at anytime.

I have no idea what to get my 15 (16 in January) year old step daughter. I always think I have something good for her but no. Last year we got her an MP3- she never uses it. A few years ago we got her an electric pencil sharpener as a stocking stuffer & I swear that has turned out to be the gift of the decade. Who would have figured? Any ideas?

There are about 3 thousand things I see for the little one. Problem is- I'll be tired of playing with 2999 after about ten seconds but she'll want to play for hours.

I am so not ready for Christmas this year.

Gobble Gobble

Happy Thanksgiving everyone.

The biopsy went ok and I should have results on Tuesday. I'll post about this tomorrow.

Thursday Thirteen Thanksgiving Version
I am thankful for:
1. My husband
2. My children
3. The rest of my family
4. That I have a job I like (most of the time anyway)
5. It was my left foot & not my right so I can still drive.
6. Local anesthesia
7. Vicodin
8. My mother's sausage stuffing
9. Did I mention Vicodin?
10. That someone I have known for a long time has had a dream come true.
11. Good books
12. Health insurance
13. Jesus and the conversation I had with him during my biopsy

I Never Said I Was Graceful

Here's an entry for the Dumb Ass Mama files. I think I jinxed myself with yesterday's post.

I worked half day yesterday to make up for time lost during Vomitfest 2006. When I got home Squishy wanted to see her Nana. God forbid they go three days without seeing each other. I put her in the booster seat, took a step back, caught my foot on the curb and almost screamed because of the pain. I sat down and it eased up so we went to my mother's. While we were there the pain increased a little bit but it was still no big deal. Did I go home and put my foot up? Why no, I went to the grocery store. Of course it was packed with stressed out, nasty people. Half way through my list I thought I was going to cry, it hurt that much. I hobbled out with a women behind me complaining "Why can't some people walk a little faster?" And Happy Thanksgiving to you too.

Anyway, to make a long story short- I went to the emergency room. Thank God it's not broken. I tore the ligaments on the top and side of my foot. Let me tell you, this hurts worse than when I broke my leg. Is that weird or what? The doctor told me if I stayed off the foot & kept it elevated and iced for 3-5 days it should be fine. I laughed at him and asked how long will it take to heal if I don't stay off it. For some reason he didn't think this was funny. But it is reality- I have a three year old for Pete's sake.

Things to be thankful for this Thanksgiving Eve:
It's not broken.
It's my left foot so I can still drive.
The pain in my foot is helping to keep my mind of the biopsy this afternoon.

Anxiety

That word about sums up what I'm feeling right now. I'm not talking about full blown panic attack- just a constant low level anxious feeling. I gotta tell ya, I'm nervous about tomorrow's biopsy. I'm not overly concerned about the whole Molly Ignant thing. If it's cancer, I'll deal with that.

No, I'm having anxiety about the biopsy itself. I'm not really sure why. It's not the pain thing. I have a pretty high tolerance for pain. I once fell down the stairs at work & broke my leg. I sat there talking with a co-worker while I waited for the ambulance. Granted it wasn't a big break but still. I'm not sure how I'll do with a needle in the throat but other people do it so I can too. Right? You think I can do it, don't you?

My mom is bringing me (the Big Guy has to work, if he doesn't he won't get paid for Thursday & we need the money). I love my mother but (of course there's a but) she is very, umm, hyper. She thinks because she is over 60 that she has infinite wisdom. While I would agree that she can teach me some things, there are other things out there that she knows jack shit about. She could incite the pope to murder. As I am typing this my anxiety is increasing. I can actually feel it in my chest. Holy crap, my mother is the root of my anxiety and it only took 37 years to figure this out. Duh. Another thing, maybe two, she has a lead foot and thinks all drivers should yield to her, she weaves, she tailgates and she curses like a sailor. No- a sailor could take lessons from my mother. She does this all at the top of her lungs while flipping the bird.

Maybe I should take a cab. Anybody gonna be around tomorrow around 1:00? No, could you FedEx me a xanax or three?

Where I Take the Easy Way Out

Once again Julianna has a question. Once again I take the easy way out. Yup, I am extremely lazy today.

Do you like summer better than winter? Or fall better than spring?

Well I like Summer better mostly because I hate snow. I hate driving in it, I hate walking in it and I hate playing in it, which of course the Squishy One wants to do.

Even though I have terrible allergies, I prefer Spring. I like the renewal. Spring feels like hope and a new beginning to me. Fall feels more like an ending.

Keep 'em coming.

The One Where I Answer a Comment

Special thanks to Julianna for this post:


So have you ever watched "Life Aquatic?" That can be your next post. "Yes, I have watched 'Life Aquatic'," or "No, I have no watched 'Life Aquatic.'" :)


No, I have never watched "Life Aquatic".

Feel free to ask more questions, I'll take all the help I can get!

Jumping on the Christmas Bandwagon

I hate to see Christmas decorations up before Labor Day. The proper time for any Christmas talk, music, decorations or sales starts on the Friday after Thanksgiving. I don't want to see Christmas cards next to Halloween costumes.

But...

Here at the Ice Cream Mama blog we are talking Christmas. (yeah, yeah, I hate me too. But it's that NaBloPoMo- it's sucking out my brain cells.)

So in upcoming posts it's Christmas stuff (there will be other stuff too but when there's nothing else to say, it's ho ho ho). I figured I would give all four of you fair warning.

I'll post some really great cookie recipes if it's any consolation. I'm not really Ice Cream Mama, I really am Cookie Mama. I love cookies.

Too Tired to Think of a Title

Well, Vomitfest 2006 continues.

When I signed up to post every day I figured it would be a good little time occupier, something besides flipping through 185 useless channels. What I didn't take into consideration was that when I want to so something the forces of the universe invariably conspire against me. Who the hell would have figured on biopsies, all the doctor bs that led up to that, sick kids, extra work hours and other unnamed things that are sucking the life out of me.

Of course my Type A personality won't let me say, "So sorry NaBloPoMo just can't do it."
Noooo, I have to post, I said I would post and dammit I will post! What the hell is wrong with me?! We are about half way through the month, be prepared for even more scintillating posts from Ye Olde Ice Cream Shoppe.

When it's all over I'll go back to my intended 3-4 posts a week and maybe, just maybe they will be good ones- no promises.

185 Channels

We have 185 channel and I still cannot find anything to watch. It seems like such an old complaint. I still find it true. Back in the day, we had maybe 5 channels on a thirteen inch black and white. We had to get off our butts to change them and there was nothing on. Now I have 180 more channels on a 32 inch color stereo television. I just can't get into anything that is on.

Call me crazy but I just could not get into "Project Runway". I know, I know- I'm a blight on females everywhere. A lot of the bloggers I read were really into this show. I like controversy and all that stuff but I just couldn't stand this show. I have no use for fashion. I live in jeans and tennis shoes. I am at work in jeans and tennis shoes (yes, VERY casual and no sore feet from heels! I know you're jealous.)
Other popular shows I just can't get into- Grey's Anatomy, Desperate Housewives and Studio 60 whatever. I know- lame. I just can't get into them.

I watched 24 religiously until the last few episodes last season and then I kind of fizzled on that. Plus that is one of those "off season" shows. A new one won't start until January.

I used to be hooked on all manner of Law & Order. But now- eh. I loved Criminal Minds, Numbers and Hell's Kitchen. Not so much now. I don't know why.

So what am I watching? Animal Planet and Dr G. Medical Examiner. Oh and the one new show I have hope for- Jericho. And House. Love House. Hugh Laurie is great in this show.

I'm usually not a picky TV person. Is it just me or is there really nothing on? What are you guys watching?

Pogue Mahone

My mother just got back from Ireland. She went with a bunch of her friends for five days. In the short conversation we were able to have (I was at work), she told me how beautiful it is and how cool it was to be in the country her grandmother came from. And, yes, my 60-something year old mother and her 60-something year old friends went on a pub crawl. She likes Guinness. In a pint. At the pub. Learning Irish drinking songs. Good for her!

She then asks me, "Do you know what pogue mahone means?" giggle giggle

"Yeah, Ma, it means kiss my ass."

"How do you know this?!" disappointment that she couldn't catch me with a Gaelic curse word

"Ma, I went to college to learn to curse in six languages."

Really, one of my favorite bands is The Pogues. How could I not know what pogue mahone means?

If I were to be famous I could go on Inside the Actor's Studio. James Lipton would ask me, "What is your favorite swear word?" I would immediately declare, "Pogue Mahone!"

Ah, Ireland. Not only is the land beautiful but so are the curse words.